The Task of Perception Realignment

There are seven people standing in a room. How many rooms are there?

Did you answer one? The logical part of your brain quickly sees an answer in the question, but in this case, the logical, first glance answer is wrong.

There are seven rooms. While those seven people are physically sharing the same space, none of them are in the same room. Each person’s perception creates their reality and no two realities are the same. While you and I can perceive each other, we do not have the same perception which means our realities differ.

This is an important distinction because a common mistake in marketing is assuming that people see things exactly like you do. Yes, they can experience a similar problem which could have a similar solution, but you can never assume that how you perceive those things is exactly how someone else perceives it.

Perception is everything because it creates reality.  This wouldn’t be so difficult if every person was comfortable with their perception or reality. However, in life, people tend to worry about how others perceive them. As The Advisor, this is a serious concern for you because the perception of others can affect the Hero’s perception of themself.

There is no way to truly know how another person perceives you or the world or your business. Even with our robust languages, it’s difficult to always find the right combination of words for someone else to clearly understand our meaning or intention. If it was easy, there’d be no conflict, anger, or heartbreak, but that’s not how humans are wired.

When you consider our modern world, social media content is created and curated to try and influence how others perceive us. Humans post what they want others to know. It’s only a snapshot of the whole truth, but as natural storytellers, we build out whole narratives based on a single photo or handful of words. Obviously, that person’s life is better than mine, right? They’re in beautiful locations, laughing, smiling, living in the most “authentic” way possible. This false narrative is why I’m skeptical of anyone that prescribes to a “good vibes only” perspective.

The unfortunate side effects of these inauthentic “movie trailer” lifestyles are other people find less contentment with their life or believe they’re doing something wrong. If they live like that, I guess my life isn’t that great. This is exactly what you’re helping your Hero avoid. Their perception is affected by another person’s perception, without even knowing if what they perceive is true or not. It’s sadly a pitfall that helps fuel society’s mental health challenges.

Whether we care to admit it, we can be influenced by another person’s perception. As a social species, we want to be accepted by others and sometimes this can lead to making decisions which oppose our best interest because we think about how others perceive our choice. This is the state of social media, even if that wasn’t the intent when it was developed. Why else would we post for the 731st time a picture of our dinner for everyone to see?

Here’s the real lynchpin of the issue: your perception is influenced by your experiences and the people in your life. No matter how independent you want your decision to be, your lived experience includes those around you and all the interactions you’ve had. Each interaction and perception from family, friends, and strangers can, and do, influence our perception which, in some cases, influences our decisions and actions too.

For instance, does a Walmart t-shirt function in the same manner as a Burberry t-shirt? Both t-shirts fulfill their purpose. They have relatively the same silhouette. They cover you in the same way. All your basic needs associated with a t-shirt are met. So why does a Walmart t-shirt cost $10 and a Burberry t-shirt cost $590 (or more)? Why would someone pay that much money when they can easily buy a product that fits their needs for hundreds of dollars less?

If you see two people on the street, one in a Walmart t-shirt and the other in a Burberry t-shirt, how does your perception about them differ? Yes, this is a surface level perception, but a lot of our perceptions are only based on the information our senses gather in the moment. Either we choose to not dig deeper or the interaction isn’t high on our priorities considering we have hundreds, if not thousands, of interactions every day.

It’s important to understand the potential perceptions of your hero as you guide them toward success. Their perception might need realignment at the beginning, during, or at the cusp of success. Success is difficult if you don’t know your Hero’s perception of it. There are legions of talented, amazing people no one’s heard of because with all their abilities, those remarkable people believe success is reserved for others, not themselves. This perception feeds their uncertainty which lowers self-confidence, a key factor in success. You need to be prepared for this since 85% of people struggle with low self-confidence at some point in their life.

Consider the Hero’s ongoing perception as a persistent threat. Perception can change as quickly as the breeze. Success can appear fickle. While the Hero has likely envisioned a future where they’ve succeeded, they also envisioned all the ways they can fail. It’s more likely they’ve envisioned more obstacles and ways to fail than succeed. If put on a scale, success feels like a feather and obstacles feel like an elephant. The weight of one clearly dwarfing the other, even though the value of the feather far outweighs the obstacles. The feather is happiness, liberation, and accomplishment.

The brilliant and wise Lao Tzu said, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” This is your mantra for perception realignment. You will constantly reframe their perception from the magnitude of the complete journey to the step they’re taking now. If you keep them focused on the current step instead of total steps required, their perception is rooted in positivity and immediate success.

Perception is about the present. The feeling of their feet touching down. The ground supports their feet as their weight shifts over it. Your presence alongside celebrating this accomplishment of this step helps build momentum to the next one. Soon, before they realize it, they’re a thousand steps in and ultimate success is only a few steps away.

Your ability to help the Hero to stay present and moving forward is a philosophical challenge, but maintaining their momentum might require factual reinforcement. As challenges are encountered, there will be moments you’ll need to provide more, and perhaps new, information to counter preconceived perceptions. Remember, we all rely on our senses and experiences to form our perception, but that doesn’t mean our perception is accurate.

Consider the idiom “you don’t know what you don’t know” your mantra when introducing your Hero to new evidence.